sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
im flying all the way to minnesota to see him for four days... cutest-best-friend-reunion or most-epic-booty-call-ever?
who says it cant be both...
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Randomize
