12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
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