She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
I think I've given more of my business cards to Chipotle trying to win free burritos than anyone else
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
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