It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
