OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I think I am morally bankrupt
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
Randomize
