She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
Someone changed my text signature to "Also, I think I might be gay" last night. Also, I think I might be gay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Randomize