i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Get over your kidney infection all ready. You have been sober for too long.
Randomize
