what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
