I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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