Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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