I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
