I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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