"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Randomize
