Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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