i think i have herpe
just one?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
Randomize
