That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
