we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
Randomize
