And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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