Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
Just saw a crackhead get taken down by pd in the canal. Its offically spring
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
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