But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Randomize
