You're completely useless in the revolution.
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
