I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize