I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.
Did you put it in the freezer again?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
she peed on how many people?
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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