so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
