Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
They have beer where we have blood.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Randomize