I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
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