tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
Boobs speak an international language.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
