he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
Randomize
