after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
I need to not be around brick walls while intoxicated.
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
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