I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
When the stripper from this weekend is your cashier at Publix the next day 😐💀#pensacolaproblems
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
