At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize