I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Who would we be if we didn't go out to drink during finals week? NOBODY
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
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