dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
