yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
I realized as I was wesiging my engamemby ring that you'd never love me tha same. I have life plans and Sam showed them to me
What? You're not speaking real words.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Randomize