oh god the rape fog is back!
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
