dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
babies were throwing up all over the place
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize