What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
they need to just BURY HIM!
you should just get pregnant. that way you don't need to decide on a career.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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