and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
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