While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
