and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
If I die, sorry about rent.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Randomize
