oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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