Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
Right. Will do. I'll call you if I need a ride. (that is a double meaning, go with it.)
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize