Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
Its about making memories worth repressing
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
