Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
Be prepared to possibly be invited to a fancy strip club breakfast on Friday and be prepared to say yes.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
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