I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Randomize
