that's an acceptable place to lick
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
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Her bed looked like it had just hosted a water balloon fight. It was that good.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
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He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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