I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
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