don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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