omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
He straight up just had me drive all the way here and when I got here he was drinking a cup of tea and right after said he needed to go to bed
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
The feeling are messing with the penis
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
