shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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