ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
They left me at home... I'm a liability
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
